Many men who are still dealing with knowing more about their sexuality feel doubtful whether or not there is any difference in being gay. This is because, in the eyes of society, it seems that the fact that you be homosexual determines that you completely change your way of being.
From the way the person dresses, to the way they speak. Including, many people believe that every homosexual knows everything about fashion and is a fan of Madonna.
Others believe that the fact that the man came out makes him “less macho”. It turns out that many of these concepts are extremely toxic. Mainly in a society where we want the male public, heterosexual or homosexual, to change some behaviors that are harmful to everyone.
The only and exclusive difference between being gay and being straight is that the homosexual is attracted to people of the same sex. Meanwhile the heterosexual is attracted to the opposite sex.
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Okay, that's the only difference. Moreover, it does not require a code of conduct or behaviors that the person who assumes must have. Even if society wants to impose it.
Not every gay is a "crazy fagot", and not every straight is a "macho". Including terms like these only serve to undermine the very understanding that men have about themselves.
You can come out and continue to go play football with your friends on Wednesdays. And you can be straight and always want to wear looks that are trending in men's fashion. The big issue here is social acceptance. Regardless of your sexual orientation, you need to accept yourself.
Many people focus on the “personification of sexuality”. That is, characteristics and behaviors that demonstrate that the individual likes people of the same sex or the opposite sex.
However, by focusing their attention on this, people forget that the world is much more plural than that.
Being gay, like being straight, is an exercise in breaking prejudices that exist within oneself, and that are imposed by society.
For example, many people claim that the gay man's libido is usually evident. It shows when he's interested in another guy. However, the heterosexual man also does the same thing.
We even need to be very careful not to limit certain toxic attitudes to straight people, when they also exist in gay people. A simple example is sexism.
Many heterosexual men do not know how to respect women's space and will. They are invasive and even abusive, wanting to touch when they don't have permission.
It's the classic case of the gay guy, for example, who tells the girl to change clothes in front of him just because he's homosexual, when in fact this also configures a situation that generates discomfort for many women.
The truth is that men, regardless of sexual orientation, tend to adopt the model of “being macho”, which involves a series of characteristics and behaviors that are not healthy for anyone, such as:
All these characteristics, unfortunately, are present in both homosexuals and heterosexuals, who most of the time are raised in the same pattern of “being male” and that is what has to change.
It doesn't matter if you like to play football with friends or you prefer to go to the salon to give your look a makeover. Your quest, whether or not you come out, should focus on your evolution as a human being.
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After all the reflection above, you must have already understood that being a degree differs in just one thing from being straight, which is the sex that attracts you. Homosexuals like people of the same sex while heterosexuals like people of the opposite sex.
Now, let's talk about how you can be who you are, more fully and acceptingly.
The first tip for you to live more fully and with acceptance is to stop wanting to personify your guidance when you don't want to. Basically, if you don't like what society thinks gay people are supposed to like, that's fine!
Don't you know any slang used in the community? There's no problem. No idea what Lady Gaga's last single was? OK!
Before wanting to “come out of the closet” as many people say, get to know yourself. It is very important that you understand your own sexuality before you want to tell the world about it.
And a very important thing, it's also okay to want to keep that to yourself. The most important acceptance you will have in life is your own.
Many people think that judgments only happen to those outside the LGBTQ+ community, which is a mistake. Unfortunately, there is a lot of judgment among the members themselves, who often demand attitudes from others.
And if you want to be gay, or even straight or bisexual, fully, not judging is a big step. Accepting the other also helps with self-acceptance.
If there are more “effeminate” gays in your cycle or out of it, that's okay. And the opposite is also valid.
The truth is, if you want to command acceptance and respect from people, you also need to practice both.
Being gay makes no difference. What will differentiate you from others is how you handle and accept your own sexual orientation.
