Have you ever heard of the dominance and submission dynamic? After movies like 50 Shades of Grey, the acronym BDSM became popular and shed some light on the hidden world of non-traditional sexual practices. Many people identified themselves or, at least, were interested in the options of the world of sex other than “vanilla”.
Unraveling the acronym BDSM will explain the 6 terms included in the acronym: Domination and submission (D/s), Bondage and Discipline (B/D) and finally, Sadism and Masochism (S/M).
Keep reading if you're curious or want to start practicing BDSM!
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You have certainly heard or spoken to your partner: “I am more dominant” or “I am more submissive”. For those more advanced in denominations, even the term Switch, i.e. versatile, also came up in the conversation.
In the world of BDSM, these terms go a little deeper, starting with the way words are spelled. Domination always starts with a capital “d”, while submission comes with a small “s”, demonstrating the hierarchy of the relationship. The submissive will always be "inferior" to his dominator, master or owner.
When we talk about Domination and submission, the practice includes a group of customs, behaviors and even rituals where a person (submissive) cedes control over him to another person (dominant). The D/s context can only be used in role play, in other words, in moments of sexual practice, or it can also expand to a lifestyle, with the roles of Dominant and submissive being exercised 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Submissive with handcuffs. Image: pornpics.com
D/s practices need not necessarily involve physical contact. The psychological element plays a crucial role in BDSM practices, both to explore the side of security and dependence, when a submissive trusts his well-being to his dominator, and to cause pain, humiliation and other feelings present in the other letters of the acronym.
Individuals in D/s relationships may or may not be romantically involved with each other, with the possibility of being monogamous or polygamous, and the gender and sexuality of the pair is not relevant. BDSM couples can be heterosexual, homosexual, women can dominate and men can be submissive and vice versa.
BDSM: sane, safe and consensual. Image: pornpics.com
In addition, there are practices of Domination and submission that do not necessarily involve the sexual act, but the entire emotional dynamics of D/s. Due to all these very individual details, which many times will only make sense to those included in that specific dynamic, all practitioners of BDSM follow a very clear rule: sane, safe and consensual.
In order for the dynamics of BDSM to be pleasurable for both and to respect the limits of peers, there are ethical principles to be followed by practitioners. The main one is “sane, safe and consensual”. In other words, whether in the role play or in routine practices, being in a BDSM relationship or contract must be a choice.
